The first time my Mom misused the word badass was so much better. She parallel parked outside the thrift store and said “ignore my badass parking job” and I was just dying laughing. She didn’t get it so she asked what was funny and I told her bad-ass meant “like Samuel L Jackson”, but in hindsight that was probably a bad definition because to her he’s the guy who swears and shoots people in movies, which would just mean the regular kinda bad.
Hey BT I'm too lazy to go to your page and type in your ask box, but Tribes Ascend is free to play on steam and it's a pretty amazing game. we should play sometime I need people to play with.
Is it on steam now? When I first heard of it it wasn’t on steam and was apparently super unoptimized and my computer isn’t the greatest. I’ll give it a download, though? Maybe. It’ll take like..two weeks to download.
I hope it was a fire. On his genitals. That was started by tiny pubic crabs.
A small civilization of pubic crabs that have learned to wield fire to cook their food after experiencing a static shock elsewhere on the person’s body who will eventually learn to utilize small rocks and other tools and become a great civilization of tiny pubic crabs with miniature technology to fuel their growth and buildings that dwarf the size of the man’s hilariously minuscule penis.
“I work at an AT&T store and have to deal with iPhone issues all the time. One time a woman walks in with her iPhone all pissed off and says, “You sold me a defective iPhone! I can barely hear the other person on this damn f**king thing! I want a new one NOW!”. Taking one look at the phone I told the lady that I could fix it for her, but she doubted me and said that she didn’t want a “fixed yet defective iPhone you dumb a-hole”. I proceeded to take off the screen film that comes on new iPhones which covers the mic as well and told her to try it now. She turned red faster than Santa with a bottle of whiskey.”—Work Sucks: No YOU’RE defective. (via collegehumor)